Y’all already know just how altruistic we are here on Fifietalks right? Yes you do. Come on, don’t lie. You do. Well today we are here to teach you how to better protect yourselves. Again. Yes we already gave you some scam protection on 5 ways to not be scammed in Nigeria.
As you should know by now, official unofficial Nigerian motto is- scam or be scammed. Yes, people. It’s literally a jungle out there. And if you look hard enough just at the border that separates us from cotonou there is a little billboard with the words This is Nigeria, Land of Scams clearly written on it. In fact so bad is it that under normal circumstances an article with a heading like this should be inexhaustible. But this article is just focused on the most painful and seemingly innocent scams;
- Touch and follow
This scam comes with some supernatural assistance. Yes, we know the atheistic congregation would like to believe that there is no supernatural and as such jazz/juju is nothing but unfounded mythology. Well, today is not about Spiritism 101 so we’re not going to delve into that. What we are going to talk about however is the touch and follow jazz. Here’s how it works- the touch and follow jazzman approaches you touches you with his juju coated hand and asks you to go into your house and get him something worth lots of money. Or actual money. The remedy to this scam has been empirically founded to be one really resounding hot slap. The kind that makes you see stars. See why this scam is painful? In some extreme cases people under this jazz are led away into deep deep forests and nothing is ever heard of them again.
- Raffle Draw/ Gamble/ Lottery Ticket Scam
The same way I had a hard way coming up with a comprehensive name for this scam is the same way the scam hits you- in an incomprehensible way. Picture this- you’re taking a cool walk down a busy street and then you sight a small gathering of people clustered around a man with phones, laptops, motorcycle or any valuable thing. And then he says you should drop 5k to stand a chance to win any of the listed valuable. All you have to do is tell him which card is the one with a black heart on it. Then the people around cheer you on and encourage you to bet and tell you how legit it is. What you don’t know however is that everyone there is part and parcel of the scam. The man goes on to shuffle the three cards in his hands and you gullibly place your bet with the 5k your debtor just paid you. Of course you never get the card right, and then you kiss your cute 5k goodbye.
- Online shop scam
This happens when you buy stuff online. Seeing as most online stores operate on a pay before delivery rule it is easily the most occurring scam. You part with your hard earned Naira notes to pay for that ridiculously highly priced wig that had definitely gone through one really sharp phone camera plus lots and lots of filters all in a bid to make it look better. And then after the seller confirms payment rather than do the right thing and send you what you paid for they block you. Or if they are kind enough they give you something totally different from what they put up with a more inferior quality. Or just something entirely different. Like you pay for a set of makeup brushes and get a packet of pencils instead. We got your back though. Read up on our How to spot a fake Instagram account and stay safe out there while shopping on the gram.
- Relationship scam
Yes, this is Nigeria where every single thing is scammable. You still don’t get the picture? Well here’s how you can get scammed with relationships. You get into one with this seemingly amazing person and somehow down the line you become their ATM machine. You literally begin to sponsor their existence, you feed them, house them, clothe them and even pay their debts. And if somehow your mother’s prayers start to make headway and you begin to come back to your senses they hit you with an engagement ring so big and bright you forget how bright your future looks without them in it. And then they make you start the whole darn relationship all over. Any time you bring up a discussion to set a date for the wedding they blab their way out of it until one day when you come home from work to find an empty apartment. No them, no furniture, no nothing. They abscond with every single property you own. Now was that graphic enough? I know it was.
This people have changed their name three times but we still know they are legit scam. In fact changing names is even a scam to start with. And oh, now they are EEDC in case you are looking for them like I was. They make you pay huge electricity bills and end up giving you electricity for just 48 hours in a whole week. And then when you don’t pay up for the next month they show up right on time with their annoying ladders to cut you off. Now tell me how that is not a scam.
Come on, cheer up. There is hope down this tunnel. Read up on 5 ways to not be scammed in Nigeria and you’ll be just fine. You’ll be needing more protection against the relationship scam though, and we still got you covered- 5 Signs you are a side dish will give you all the protection you need.
And if you don’t know how to act after you realize you’ve been scammed, our article on 3 Ways Nigerians React to Being Scammed will help you figure out the best way to act and help assuage your trauma.