Chioma Vs Ivan

I love drama! If you know you love drama, do hand laik dis??

So one angry shild subbed Queen of the coast yesterday, wait fes. Do you even know who Queen of the Coast? Don’t tell me no oo cause I wee just laugh you.

Ok let me be serious, US/Naija based sleek utuocha beebi Chioma Amaryllis Aghahotu is the Queen of the coast???

Don’t ask me what it means, I no know o?

So one angry shild cum ‘stalker’ Ivan-Whyte Eagle Lawson decided it’s time to show case his wereh, he wrote

“Dear Chioma Amaryllis.                Ahaghotu,

Money you no get,

young you no young,

fine you no fine,

fairly used human hair            you no fit afford,

small sense sef you no.            get…

…but you go dey arrogant.         dey insult everybody.               mama full Facebook.

Aunty…you sure say you.        well? 😀 😀 :D:

•Ivan Lawson


Chioma got tagged to the post and she wasn’t having any of that, so she commented “I deleted your ass!ignored your stalkerish inbox messages. After whining,  feel free to crawl back into the closet from whence you came. Whatever you have to tell yourself as you wank to my no fine ass pictures. I got the messages in my inbox dumbass, unanswered,  I blocked you,  so cry some more like the whiny little bitch you are!! I gotta a tampon too since you are obviously PMSing. I am not fine,  I know,  not smart, hahhahahhaha okpo, yet your thirsty and was in that inbox writing long epistles though. You gotta come at me harder with your busted looking ass. Next time tag me properly,  so your followers can see what a little confused cunt you are.”




She made subsequent posts on her wall, she said “One goat wanted to yab his mother who he mistook for me and I kid you not. These were his words. More or less. Chioma Amaryllis…. Fine you no fine. Money you no get. Intelligence you no get. The moron even said I couldn’t even afford used human hair weave! That was his diss oh. Nigga thought he was dropping bars too.   So in true form,  I went to the post,  liked the post,  showered him with enough insults to reach his grandchildren. Then blocked him.  Why the ‘shade’ you ask?  I deleted him from my list and blocked his inbox messages cause he was stalking me regularly,  writing epistles of how he was a fan of the Amaryllis. I deleted him yesterday and the little cunt went to his wall to write his “ode” to me. Like 2 or 3 times.  He tagged one Aunty Gwe Gwe,  you know because a walk facebook “shade” ain’t pathetic enough till you add reinforcements. I found it amusing. I hope he appreciated the Likes I gave him. A couple of his followers are now following me too. Guess my ugly, dumb, poverty stricken life wasn’t such a turnoff after all. Why am I writing this. Shades and subs are irrelevant to me. Facebook dramas do not interest or move me. I have been on Facebook since 2004 (this is my second facebook page)  that is over a decade. I have seen it all. I have been a problem ever since I was born. This sharp mouth is not for show,  this is how I am wired!  Punchlines and sarcasm is part of me. I can’t change that. I won’t change that.  I took on an entire organization single handedly and had them shaking in their boots, I am not your average chick,  and that is not a boast.  A post or two by a disgruntled stalker fan  sounds like a love song to me.”


“My first Facebook sub and its from an ordinary wanker. Fuck my life mehn! Ada Levi aralashi!”

Babe haf vex laik bad bad?

Her friends and followers of course finished the ‘ordinary wanker’ ?

Jacqueline Ifeyinwa Ibeh commented “I thought it was a human you were talking about! Na that achi kota ekweonu you dey give attention??

Babe is a wa for you ooh!!!”

Mercedes E. T. Okwukogu-Egwor commented “The earlier a psychologist is gotten for those two, the better. I actually feel sorry for them.”

Olufunke Philips wrote “Oh that guy. It’s not today that that that one is not well. Attention seeking twat.”

Sylvia Iwuchukwu said “Like a moth drawn to flame,he got too close and got burnt…I’d actually have felt a Lil empathy for him if he weren’t such a nutcase…He should have known that engaging you in a battle of wits would be like swimming in shark infested waters…He’s not worth your time of day biko”

And our very own fifie commented “He is ALWAYS seekig attention, the pitiful man child.

Recently, he writes  for one woman like that, subs for her, calling  out all her real and perceived enemies. All updates on her wall are his, because she cannot  comnunicate in good English like that.

If I had known, I would have told you not to bother . It has been ongoing for a couple of weeks now.

Starve him of the attention. He has been desperately  trying to seek it through random subs.”

I’m practically wailing for that young man, I’m not sure he is going to ever recover from this?

Next time he will make sure he go where his age mates are playing and play ?


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