Strange things happen. If ever you’re told to be sure you keep your records clean, don’t ever joke with that sh!t. Don’t. Seriously. Just don’t!
I was once diagnosed with HIV. Strange, right? Yeah. But here’s some sh!t that’s even weirder than that – I’m presently not HIV positive. In fact, I’ve never been HIV positive. No, I never attended any of those “Power Packed Crusades” either. I’ve just never been HIV positive, that’s it.
So, my diagnosis. What exactly happened? Well, I’ll get back to that. Let me quickly probe into your emotions with a story. Stay with me.
9 years ago, about 2 years after the diagnosis, November 2008 to be precise, I met a girl at my church’s musical concert. That girl, her smile was the first thing that got me, it was like heaven. We got talking, and I also got to know she grew up in the East. I don’t know if its normal but I’ve always had a special liking for South Eastern girls – it made me want her the more. I would later discover her “bust,” get enraptured by her care free, open book nature and her resourcefulness.
It was one of those “this is the person” moments for me. I’d told myself I was going all the way with her even though we’d barely known each other in a week. Not even once did I anticipate the rude shock that awaited me.
“Daddy said he would never support our relationship because of your mother.”
Those words, they jolted me back to life. I didn’t even know the man, ‘what does he know about my mother?’ The next few exchanges made things very clear. But it wasn’t mom’s fault, he caused it. I wasn’t going to back down easily though, I quickly explained things to my girl. She just couldn’t wrap her mind around it, talk less of believing her dad could do such. Smh.
The months that followed had our relationship moving from climax to several anticlimaxes. It eventually jerked over and over, till it was brought to a miserable halt in about 2 years after we set out. Her dad had done all within his abilities to run us aground – all because he felt mum tampered with his “business.” But was that the entire story? Was it even the truth? Funny man. LOL.
That break up, the build up to it caused us to become sworn enemies. The same name that once stirred the other person’s heart to racing was now accompanied by nothing short of cringes upon its mention. But for some reason, the warmth of the feelings just never totally faded. We went our separate ways, forming relationships with other people, each time, feeling bad upon learning of the other person’s love life. Kids.
Six years gone and I walked down the aisle with the woman of my dreams, the same girl I was denied every chance of being with. With her, I lost my life. In her, I found it. Oh, it happened so fast. And that funny man, he still sought ways to ruin our relationship. Some people just never change, do they? Life would eventually school him though. He would later lose it all, having none but loneliness as companion.
Now, back to my questions, do you still think this is one the regular life with HIV stories? What was “his business,” how is it possible I was diagnosed with HIV even though I wasn’t positive?
Simple. Just one word – misdiagnosis. Or two words – “intentional misdiagnosis.” Or several – “Intentional misdiagnosis with the sole purpose of swindling.”
Yes, I was seriously ailing, and mama had taken me to a lab for test, only be told her son was HIV positive…
“…but don’t worry, I will cure him within 1 week…”
…all for 350K.
I wondered if, in all those school years, I’d received “Formal Miseducation” but mama was just too emotionally broken to question the situation.
We later decided to seek second and third opinions before giving the “miracle cure” a try. Turned out…it was my first time getting typhoid. All the Doctors involved were astounded upon hearing my life with HIV story. “That Lab,” it was reported to the Nigerian Medical Association. Heard it was shut down thereafter.
And…that was how mama “tampered” with “his business.” Yes, if the situation had been different, I would be writing regular life with HIV stories. But my future Father In Law had deliberately misdiagnosed me in order to make a sucker of my mum, and he was not sorry about it. How about that?
So, my point? Just two. First, Love would always find a way. The other? Read the second paragraph over and over again till that darn thing sticks!
To be humane is beautiful.
The Story You Just Read MIGHT/MIGHT NOT Be A Work Of Fiction
E. O. Akande writes under the pen name – Dr. Cum. He’s every man’s man you meet in your everyday life.